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Tuesday, December 19, 2006

The Shit Tale

Once upon another time, there was a really horrible man living in a place called Pee Nank. This man had the eyes of a frog, and he had an uncannily shitty face. Let’s not call him by a name. He’s not even worth it. This repulsive man always treated people dreadfully bad. One day, Mr. Goddie decided to give this man castigation for what he did.

And because Mr. Goddie was vacationing on The Black-Out City called Mett Dhane, He then flew to Pee Nank and kidnapped that man quietly. No trace, no clue, nothing. The next thing that man knew was that he was laying inside a baggage car with hands all tied up and mouth shut. He could listen to the engine sound spluttering around him. The car stopped suddenly. He had no clue who this Mr. Goddie was and what the hell was He doing with him.

Mr. Goddie threw him to an unknown river in a distant suburban called Them Bjung. His body was bouncing here and there until he reached the very bottom of the filthy river. Covered in dirt, he couldn’t breathe well due to the stinky shits at the bottom of the unflowed river. Drowned in helplessness and with no explanation of why this was happening, he was united with all the garbage and crap that lay there forever.

Two weeks later, a squad from the sanitation department arrived there because of the tips from the people who lived nearby, complaining about the irresistible smell coming from the big pile of garbage beneath the river. They moved all the shits (his body included) into a recycling company in order to reprocess it and then they turned all the dung into a better use like manures or fertilizers.

The compost which had been created was distributed all across the country, and so every molecule of our guy’s body was being used by thousands of thousands of farmers. His particles then grew as plants and vegetables, which were consumed by an ample of innocent human all over the country. His molecules lived among them but didn’t stay for too long. Eventually, they all pooped and so every little bit of his body was forced out as the form of one same thing, as shit.

The shits traveled in pipes and were gathered back together into a big dumping device controlled by the government. They were reunited once more through the water-channels and were shipped into the open ocean.

The shits dissolved in water and were eaten by zooplankters, which were eaten by small fish, and which were chomped by larger fish, and then masticated by sharks. The sharks swam back to Pee Nank, bringing his body back to his country. The sharks were killed and their fleshes were being served in so many restaurants in Pee Nank.

One day, an innocent girl named Charlene went to a restaurant and had a plate of shark meat, not knowing that the shit she was eating was the one person she had once known and despised.

And then she pooped him out again, being transferred through the water-channels as shit again, reunited again, and began his never-ending journey until the end of time, if it even seemed to.

This one soliloquy is dedicated to someone I know (you sure know who you are, for u were also helping me imagining this whole scenario :)). Just remember that when the time comes, you won’t need to worry about that shitty face keep showing up anymore, you won’t need to pretend that he doesn’t exist (because he won’t, no more), and you will even laugh when—four or five years from now—you are reading this post again.


  1. What do you wan me to comment jel? hahaha.. coz I am the one who set the scenario and you are the one who write.. hahaha.. (i think you are going to slap2 me) ^^' Btw jel, nice writing, I think we should bersatu padu open a production as a scenario writer and focus on our best enemy trus mayb we can receive oscar someday as best script writer.. mana tahu it can be our carrer.. lol.. enuf for dreaming lar.. hahaha.. and.. the songs stil gk bisa.. n i m getting late for tonite part liao.. cya.. je;.. stay jel jel pangkat 10000..