Best View : FireFox v.3 - 1280 x 800
Soliloquist's Blog : All Conversations are One-Way.

My Favourite Posts, Pick One :

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Sixteen Months Later ...

-- I took some time out of my life. In the same time, I
took some time out for my life.

What would you write on a blog you left sixteen months ago? How would you start? There are so many things I want to tell you and I have no idea how to start. How do I re-blog my life? How do I start?

Perhaps I will start with a simple hello now, shouldn't I?

Hello! Hello world! Hello blogspot! Hello my past! Hello to my old love of writing and blogging. It's been sixteen months and twenty four days since the last time I wrote on this blog.

Do I miss it? Oh boy, hell yeah.

Why did I stop writing? What brings me back now? What have happened all this time?

Time. It changes things, doesn't it? It heals. It forgets. It forgives. So let me start where I left off.

The beginning of 2010 was filled with depression and misery, as I was struggling hard to get over Minnie, well, let's not call her by Minnie anymore. In fact, let's call her by her real name, Juli Cen. I have changed now. I don't need alias
es or nicknames no more. From now on : truth.

Juli was a person I thought who loved me. Clearly, I was wrong. The moment I spent hating her almost equaled to the moment I spent hating myself. I think the latter was the problem. Relationship often fails. Juli was a chapter of my life. She is now, no more.

January 2010 marked the new beginning of my life. I really wanted to start over, new year, new beginning. That's why I left blogger, stop blogging. I
changed myself in may aspects of my life, and blogging was one of them. I did it becaus
e I wanted to get over Juli. I think it worked.

So, continuing with my new life, I met many new people, one of them was a smart and funny girl named Erin Winata, or as I called her R. She's been a bright light of my life. She really helped me in finding my self again. I survived mostly because of her.

We met for the first time on the first week of January. I had just returned from the hell-ish "vacation" in Berastagi with Juli and Erwin cs.
The Villa where the last post of this blog was written sixteen months ago.

Things went terribly wrong, but Erin helped me somehow. I'm so glad to have known her, a new person as a new beginning.

Time went on, and I felt the connection between me and Erin got stronger, but not romantically. I became like a big brother to her. It's like I was having another cool sister of my own. Our relationship grew each day, even until now. Erin went to GuangZhou to study and I couldn't be happier for her. It was her dream as she told me. I was so happy she had found a way to achieve her dream, but at the same time, I was quite sad when she went abroad. We still keep in touch, though, until now. I see her as a very good friend, a sister to me, and a person I look up and admire.

What Erin wanted to see

By March 2010, I had been going out with several girls. The memory of Juli still sketched clearly in me, so I need to keep moving on. It was White Day when I first knew a girl named Nancy. We became friends and chatted for a while. I like her. At first, she resembled Erin in some ways, but later I found out that she's different.

The stories of me and Nancy were quite unique. We share the same birth date, we have a lot of in common. I think we were both lonely. We both had exes that disappointed us. But I think, beyond that, we're just meant to be together.

Both of us went through many adventures, ones that I never thought I'd had. She made me spontaneous. She made me a better man. With her, I feel happy.

So what's going on with me during all these sixteen months?

I have been living.

I have been living, really living my life. This is different than the times I was with Juli. Or before Juli. This is better.

Time looks at us weirdly and says : "Do you think you're always the kid who gets screwed around looking for soulmates and real love? Well, things' got to change to the better. One must grow up. New life, New responsibilities."

It's not all fun and happiness, you know... all these months I'm away.... but it's life.

I think we as a human being always struggle through all the things that life throws in our way. We fall, we rise again. But time always catches on, and plays a review, an instant replay of what we were, so that we know that we have passed, that we have grown.

I'd like to think that my blog is one of those things. A means used by time to make me review my life. I read my past stories and saw how I've been growing.

Others have too. Here's for example :

Comic Garden has closed. Erwin and Lilis have been married. They're blessed with one daughter so far. I'm happy for them.

Sugi, at Comic Garden in Aug 2009

Juli Cen has graduated and moved to Tangerang. Over there, she had a new boyfriend named Erwin. Her "cousin" lover (who's called Hendra in real life) (well, not her true cousin per se... nothing more than a plot to get me jealous.) is out of her life. Hendra moves on with his life and fiance. I don't really care about him though. As for Juli, she lives her life as she wants it. I don't wish her a happy life. Just that I'm not a part of her life anymore, as much as her to my life.

Dewi, Sundra and others, we never keep in contact again after the fiasco in Berastagi. Well, who could blame them? But they are good people. I wish them to be happy.

Christian Coa, I had a beef with him. He could be a pain in the ass sometimes, but I know he means well. Though we never talk again, but I hope someday we can. Afterall, we are friends before Juli appeared.

Sugi, he still is one of my best friends until now. He never changes, which is weird. LOL. I think he's gotten better at things.

Erin, she's living in Guang Zhou now, had a crush on a France dude, Haha.. I know.. she's that good. We're still communicating. Hope she is well.

And as for Nancy, we have been going out for more than five months now. We're happy. In fact, I'm going to meet her again soon after I publish this entry.

Nancy and I, at the Sipiso-piso Waterfall, at the end of 2010

Nancy, I and Friend, at Taman Lumbini

You see, I have come a long way. We all have come a long way. Not just from sixteen months ago, but from the moment I start writing "Soliloquial Behaviour", the very first post of my blog.

And I love this blog. I love my blog. I never want to abandon this blog forever.

Why do I start writing again? The spark that ignited my long-hibernated blogging-addiction was an entry by my old highchool friend Hari Qhuang. After reading his writing, I suddenly really miss my own blog. Hahaha...

With all said and done, I'm still surprised how many things have happened to me in the last 16 months. But now it's time to get going with the present time.


It's a teacher for us. There are still so many things I'd like to write in my blog. So many things this blog has missed out.

But like I said...

How do you fit everything that's happened in the last sixteen months into a simple entry of a blog?

What would you write on a blog you left sixteen months ago?

One answer. You write from the heart.